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Unclogging My Bowels With A Corkscrew

from Volume 1 by Equestrian Butt Pummel

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lyrics

My bowels keep clogging up
Way too much Chinese food
Dogs and cats and maybe some ferrets
Any sort of pet, really

It really obstructs my asshole
It needs to be removed ASAP
I don't have any way to do it
Except for a corkscrew

I don't even know why I have one
I don't even drink wine
That shit tastes like balls
and I hate balls

I stick it in and turn it
and the stinky river flows
Instant relief from my colon
Ten minutes later it's clogged again

I do this for eight hours straight
and my asshole starts to bleed
But I don't care
I need to clear it

The brown river is now red
and I still cant fart correctly
Finally I got the big chunk
It was a tumor

credits

from Volume 1, released June 26, 2016

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Equestrian Butt Pummel Tobyhanna, Pennsylvania

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